Special Time Alone With Mom

When I first became a blogger, I quickly learned that in order to grow my blog, I needed to read and comment on other blogger’s posts. So when I started The Magic of Mothering, I knew I had to find other blogs that had similar themes and then read and comment on them. One such blog I read regularly is Thien-Kim Lam’s, I’m Not the Nanny, raising biracial kids in a race conscious world. I found out about Kim’s blog at the BlogHer 14 conference I attended this past summer.

 Obviously Kim writes about raising kids and even though her kids are young and still at home I like reading her posts. One such post from September 5th really touched me as it brought back memories of the time when my son was under five, before my daughter was born. As a stay at home mom, I got to spend such delicious time with him. Unlike Kim’s son Jaxson, my son did not hold my hand often when we went exploring and walking. But like Joxson, my son was sweet and loving. I loved the adventures we went on when it was just the two of us.

 What was it like for you when you had special time with just one child?

My New Personal Trainer

September 5, 2014 · by Thien-Kim Lam · 

Sloss - 41 Guest Post

My new personal trainer clocks in around 3 feet tall and is only 4 years old.

With his big sister back in school, Jaxson definitely feels the Sophia-sized hole in his day. Last week, he and I began a new routine. Right after the school bus picks up his sister, we head to our local park for a walk. Since April, I’ve been quietly making changes to my diet and ramping up my physical activity. I was more than happy to talk a walk in the crisp morning air with my little guy.

 On the first day of school (for Sophia), Jaxson and I donned our sneakers, filled our water bottles, and took advantage of the early morning quiet of our favorite park. I wasn’t sure how our first morning walk would go. He seems to only have two speeds whenever we  walk around the pond full of ducks and geese: running ahead of me or stopping every few minutes to pick up “a piece of nature.”

 Jaxson moves and talks non-stop from the moment he wakes up to when he finally falls asleep, surrounded by his swarm of pillows. But his sweeter side took charge our first day walking. I joked that I wouldn’t be able to keep up with him, since he’s so fast. As soon as we stepped onto the pathway, he firmly took hold of my hand and rarely let go during our 1.5 mile walk. I joked that he was my personal trainer–because he made sure I didn’t fall behind. To my surprise, he kept a brisk pace.

 With a firm grasp on my hand, he took charge. He would not leave me behind.

 In the midst of parenting, I forget how empathetic and sweet my kids are. Especially Jaxson who loves to play rough and is passionate about everything he talks about. That morning, I held his hand every time he slipped his smaller fingers into my adult sized palm. I never let go first. I soaked in those short thirty minutes as we strolled around the park.

 My little boy was growing up but he still loved me best. Sometimes it frustrates me that he only wants his mom, but that morning I was happy to be the center of his world.

 Every day I look forward to our morning walks. It’s become our special time together.

 Do you go for strolls at your park?

Please feel free to leave comments for Kim on her blog by clicking here.



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6 thoughts on “Special Time Alone With Mom

  1. Lorrie Goldin

    You’re right, it’s such a sweet time. I remember this most poignantly with my youngest daughter after her sister went away to college. Although it was tempting to moon over the one I’d lost, there was the one still at home, just dying to spend alone time she’d rarely had with me. We had such fun together, time that has figured into our close contact now even though she’s living in Spain!

    Reply
    1. Heidi BK Sloss Post author

      Nice Lorrie! I was looking forward to having that special time with my daughter after my son went off to college too. But things turned out differently from what I expected. First my lovely daughter (who is kind and mature and open-hearted) became a bit moody and hormonal around me. I brought out the beast in her, sometimes just by breathing. So while we did have some delicious times we also had some pretty awfully unpleasant times too. Also, our son went to college locally and ended up needing to move home his 2nd and 3rd years (and then he thankfully graduated a year early!). While I felt bad for my daughter and what I had hoped for “her” time alone with us, it turned out that she found it easier to not be the focus of our attention. Her last two years of high-school were a roller coaster ride of ups and downs for all of us when he finally flew the coop. I look forward to the day when she and i can (hopefully) reconnect and delight in our relationships again.

      Reply

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