Holiday Calamity: The Good, the Bad and the Just Plain Weird!

In last week’s piece I wrote about how our 2014 Thanksgiving was going to be a different and Unexpected Thanksgiving. And it sure was unexpected – but in ways that even surprised us. We did not have our romantic get-away to Santa Cruz. Instead, all our plans went out the window when I fell 4 days before Thanksgiving and broke my leg and ankle in three different places along with dislocating it. After a three hour surgery and a few nights in the hospital, I am home. So our holiday was very different from what we had expected!

This misfortune has proved to have good, bad and the just plain weird.

The Weird:

Let’s start with the weird coincidence that I have now had surgery on my left ankle three times, each time exactly 10 years apart: November 1994, November 2004 and now November 2014. Note: my husband and kids are threatening to lock me in a padded room in November 2024. Over the years it has gotten harder on me physically, but easier to deal with because of the knowledge I have gained through each successive experience. I know I need a wheel chair, crutches, handicap placard, shower bag designed to go over casts, and of course my smart phone. What a huge difference having a mini computer in my pocket makes! And over the past 20 years I have also grown up some and learned how to ask for help. I remember a bad moment in 1994 when I ate lunch on the floor of my kitchen because I couldn’t get the food from the kitchen to the couch while still relying on crutches. This year as my husband plans to be inaccessible for three days next week I have friends coming in to keep me company and help with my lack of mobility. What a difference!

The Bad:

There is no sugar coating this situation. This was a bad break and the three hours of surgery alone took a toll on me. As I write this I don’t really know my prognosis. The surgeon was saying that I should expect six to 12 months before I can get back to normal and back on the yoga mat. I am determined and I am strong, BUT I am no longer in my 20’s or 30’s or even 40’s. Realistically this is going to take a lot of time and work and maybe now in my mid 50’s (gulp) I will finally find some patience.

The Good:

The best thing to come from my misfortune is that our daughter changed her plans and came home for Thanksgiving. Her loving reaction and desire to be here to take care of me has been very healing. Other good: because of email and social media, I have been able to let people know about the accident without having to wear myself out repeating the whole awful story. Friends and family have been kind and generous with their offers to help, beautiful flowers and their understanding for when I have hit a wall and need to lay down to rest. And for some reason more readers have been leaving comments on my blog posts and subscribing and even sharing past pieces that they liked. So while my happy dance has been altered, I am none-the-less overjoyed with the support for me and my work.

Here is a parting contrast shot:

Now                versus                March 2014 in Fiji                         Now                                                                                    March 2014 in Fiji

So as usual, I will figure out a way to mother myself through this situation, but now I am open to mothering from others in my life, what a nice perspective to be able to see. When was the last time you looked back over 20 years to see how you and your life has changed? What did you learn?

As a blogger, I enjoy sharing my ideas and thoughts with people, and I get a special thrill when someone leaves a comment. When you share my posts on social media sites, I jump up and down doing a happy dance. So thank you!

18 thoughts on “Holiday Calamity: The Good, the Bad and the Just Plain Weird!

    1. Heidi BK Sloss Post author

      What a great thing to have learned! I agree, there is no time for bullshit and people pleasing is a zero sum game. But I still find myself stuck there sometimes. Wish I could say differently and I know letting go of that BS would make my life so much easier and joyful. Sigh. Can’t wait to grow up! Thanks for reading and commenting.

    1. Heidi BK Sloss Post author

      Isn’t it a funny thing that we think we know so much when we are young and then grow up to find that all the absolutes have suddenly turned ambiguous. It was so much easier to think of life as all these black and white issues when the reality as I see it is there are just a lot of beautiful and subtle shades of grey. Thanks for reading and posting!

  1. Dawn

    If you only had a Like link, you would feel surrounded by likes! Not that you hurt yourself, or that your suffering, but to support you in your healing and your continued effort to write about it! What a huge bummer, Heidi, but I’m so glad there were a few goods that came out of it. Try to be patient; let others help, and know that many people surround you with loving energy… and hopefully treats. 😉 So sorry that you are going through this, but appreciate you sharing it!

    1. Dawn

      PS) With all this time to sit… Time for a new book? Time to submit work to other sites? Time to think about what you want from your writing? Lemons… lemonade, just add vodka and it will be even better! lol

    2. Heidi BK Sloss Post author

      Thank you, appreciate the sentiment. Overall there has been progress in the last 2 weeks. Wish I found sitting at my lap top more comfortable, but it isn’t a good set up for the moment, so more writing probably isn’t going to happen. Am hoping just to keep up with a once week post. We will see. I have, however, found it very easy to sit and stitch and in this week’s post I featured my latest stitching efforts.

    1. Heidi BK Sloss Post author

      Not sure it all means, but I was finally able to get on a scale this morning and in the last 2 weeks I have lost 5 lbs! That felt great!

  2. Lorrie Goldin

    Oh, Heidi, I am so sorry about your foot, and hope the recuperation is not too onerous. That’s a pretty nice pedicure peeking out from the cast! I love your family’s idea of putting you in a padded room for 2024, but more than that I love your perspective on what these forced infirmities bring into awareness.

    1. Heidi BK Sloss Post author

      Been trying to see a pattern in the dates of the surgeries and past breaks. Not sure if that is really helpful or significant or not, but it is a fun parlour game! It feels obvious to me that the break was not just in my ankle, but on a deeper level some sort of bigger break as well. Not quite sure all of it, but it feels like the first major break 25 years ago and then this one (in my son’s home) was bookending my life as an “active” parents with dependent kids. Fact is that they are no longer living at home nor are they dependent. Time to wake up and smell the next phase of my life!

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